Qhimm.com Forums
Off-topic forums => Completely Unrelated => Topic started by: Jedimark on 2007-01-22 11:13:58
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Best Geeky Jokes Ever (going round our internal newsgroups at the moment):
One for the Maths Students:
> What's the integral of 1/cabin?
>> If you answered log(cabin) you're close
>> The actual answer is a Beach Hut - you forgot to add the "C"!
One for the Chemists:
> Chemist walks in to a bar, says "I'll have a pint of Adenosine Tri-Phosphate please"
>> Barman says "That'll be 80p"!
One for the Computer Scientists:
> Why do computer scientists get confused between Halloween and Christmas?
>> Because Oct 31 = Dec 25!
:lol:
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Hehe, I got the last one....
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I got em except for the first.
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I only got the first one :(
edit: ok, i get the last one :)
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Best Geeky Jokes Ever (going round our internal newsgroups at the moment):
....
Those are awesome! - I got some
Geek pick up line:
"I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves..."
--alternate-pickup--
"Are you differentiable? Cause if you are, I could be tangent to your curves..."
What's the derivative of a cow?
Prime Rib!
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Are those pants from Molten Core? Cause your ass is EPIC!
I don't play WoW anymore. :)
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Oh! Oh! I got one that I came up with myself!
Q: What is the derivative of Metroid?
A: Metroid Prime!
Q: What is the derivative of Optimus?
A: Ok, ok, I'll stop...
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Since I'm a maths student, let's see...
I wish I were your derivative so I could lie tangent to your curves...
This one made me laugh - a good one :-)
Q: What is the derivative of Metroid?
A: Metroid Prime!
Ehm, primes don't have anything to do with derivatives...
Oh besides, does anyone know that there is something similar to Metroids in maths? They're called Matroids (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Matroid)!
I have a list with some mathematical jokes, however, they are in German, and most of them use idioms - so they're hardly translateable...
Maybe I find some which are not so hard to translate...
- Alhexx
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Q: What is the derivative of Metroid?
A: Metroid Prime!
Ehm, primes don't have anything to do with derivatives...
eh, some people write a function and it's derivatives as such:
y = x2
y' = 2x
y'' = 2
where y' is pronounced "y prime" and y'' is "y double prime" although I suspect you knew that...
so if you had a function metroid, then it's derivative would be metroid'... lame I know :P
Most people notate derivatives as:
y = x2
dy/dx = 2x
dy2/d2x =2
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RP:
Oh, yeah, "that" prime. Sorry, I was thinking of prime numbers, not the ' mark... :oops:
You see, our maths lessons are told in german, so I think I have to say I was wrong about the English notation...
- Alhexx
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halkun & Chaos:
Most people will say the integral of 1/(cabin) would be log(cabin)... but the geeky'ness comes in by saying that it's a Beach Hut (because there's always a constant to be added after the answer denoted usually as C or sea [log cabin by the sea must be a Beach hut]!)
Edit: And (apparently) Adenosine Tri-Phosphate is commonly referred to as ATP (or 80p)
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Edit: And (apparently) Adenosine Tri-Phosphate is commonly referred to as ATP (or 80p)
That's what we called it in AP Biology...
Speaking of which...
Two gorgeous blonde biologists were in the field one fine summer day. While following a game trail, they came across a pair of tracks. "Look! a pair of tracks" The first blonde said while pointing to the ground. "Those are deer tracks," the other blonde replied. "Oh no," she said to the first, "Those are definitely moose tracks." With this, they began to argue. In fact, they were still arguing when the train hit them.
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C Dos
C Dos run
run dos run
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I'll post some of jokes from some other forum I'm visiting.
RL game review - http://uk.gamespot.com/gamespot/features/all/gamespotting/071103minusworld/1.html
What do have indian wigwam and linux in common ? No Gates, No Windows, Just Apachees inside.
(http://xkcd.com/comics/sandwich.png)
http://www.fresh99.com/messy-networks.htm
(http://www.wulffmorgenthaler.com/striphandler.ashx?stripid=02773e42-1bdf-4bdb-9b60-83e6ca44dd95)
(http://www.dusky.sk/pics/2004-04/142_linux.jpg)
(http://www.dusky.sk/pics/2004-04/142_microsoft.jpg)
The boy is smoking and leaving smoke rings into the air. The girl gets irritated with the smoke and says to her lover:
"Can't you see the warning written on the cigarettes packet, smoking is injurious to health!"
The boy replies back:
"Darling, I am a programmer. We don't worry about warnings, we only worry about errors."
+-------------------------------+
| If you cut out this coupon, |
| you can buy a new monitor! |
+-------------------------------+
there are 10 kinds of people
those who can read binary, and those who can not
Primary school, teacher asks pupils:
"George, tell us, what does your father do for a living ?"
- "He's a baker".
"Well that's nice" says teacher
"he bakes bread for us children. And what about your mother, what does she do, Marry ?"
- "she is a nurse."
"see children, she is taking care of ill people. What a wonderfull job ! And what about you Johnny?"
- "My father dances naked in the gay-club"
Teacher is stunned. "Hmmm" says teacher, "there are also such jobs".
When the lesson is over teachers goes to Johnny and asks him:
"Is it really true that your father dances in that club ?"
And Johnny replies: "No, he works in Microsoft, but all our family is ashamed because of that".
Shakespeare has given us the age-old question:
"To be or not to be ?"
Computer science has given us the answer: "FF".
0x2B | ~0x2B == 0xFF
Programmer died. He's at heavenly gates. He sees the God himself and starts complaining:
- oh God, why did you let me die so young ? I haven't cheated on my wife, I haven't written any viruses, I did not share music or films ... so why, God, why ?
God waves on him with Bible and says: - RTFM, son, RTFM.
Well and also, if you like computer geeky jokes then you should know TV series "IT crowd"
(http://img244.imageshack.us/img244/4051/gallery1oo5.jpg)
1st season (6 parts) is out and its said that 2nd season is being prepared.
and by the way, PF 11111010111 !
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IT Crowd is fun XD